Dora

If you have a small child, you likely have watched at least 500 episodes of Dora the Explorer.

Saw this on Rachel Held Evans and it made me laugh.

Here are my thoughts about Dora:

1.  She shares her first name with my mother-in-law.  When Superfrykid realized that her grandmother's real name was Dora, her eyes got REALLY big.  She thought we were kidding.

2.  Dora is annoying, but if my toddler watches the TV and gives me 20 minutes to take a shower, I'd say that is something that I can overlook.

3.  Dora is better than a lot of other annoying cartoons.  Think about it:  Maisy, Oobie, and Caillou are WAY more annoying.  AND, they are also kind of creepy.  That alligator on Maisy is nightmarish, Oobie is somebody's hand and who knows where that's been, and if Caillou were real, I would be uncomfortable around him.

Happy July 3rd.  Sorry this wasn't patriotic.  Maybe between now and tomorrow I will find something patriotic to post.  Or not.  Maybe I'll just be being patriotic instead of blogging about it.  We'll see.

to coaster or not to coaster, that is the question

Yesterday, I posted about the video of the kids making the bus monitor cry.  That was kind of heavy for me, so I thought I needed to lighten things up a bit.

Today, I bring you the video of a dad who agrees to ride an amusement park ride with his young daughter.

I think the best part is at the end when he agrees to do it again.

What a dad.

AND....that video was taken at Dollywood.

I hate roller coasters and thrill rides.  I wish I was not afraid, but I am.

I like Busch Gardens b/c they have good shows and nice scenery for non-coaster lovers like myself.  I also enjoyed Dollywood because they have the Scrambler, which is my favorite ride.  Here's a picture of me on the Scrambler at Dollywood.  Not only did I ride alone, but I put my hands up in the air like I was riding some giant super-coaster.  I told you I was a dork.

So what's your favorite amusement park and/or ride and why?

crying bus monitor and respect

Have you seen or heard about the video of the middle school kids making their bus monitor cry?

If you haven't, you can watch it here.  Although I would not recommend watching it because it's terrible.

I made it through about 47 seconds and then I stopped it.  It goes on for about 10 minutes.  From what I can gather, what those children say to this lady is horrid.

It almost made me cry.  What are we teaching our children?

I wonder if those kids are the exception to the rule or if they are more common than you'd think.

SFD & I have this conversation often.  Why are kids so disrespectful "nowadays"?

I think the answer is because we allow them to be.  As a parent, I know this is true.  Superfrykid is awesome.  She really is a great kid.  But there are times when she is very disrespectful and she seems to think that when I put her in check that I am a horrible person.  Guess what?  I don't care.  I'm not here to be her friend.  I'm here to be her mother.

That's my rant for the day.

PS - More than $600,000 has been raised for the bus monitor, Karen.  That's kind of awesome. On the other hand, respect is priceless.  But if I had to choose, I choose respect AND the $600,000.

how NOT to can green beans

I know, I know.  I keep saying I'm not going to post anything else about animals and cooking.  It's kind of like when someone tells you not to laugh & you just can't help yourself - you must laugh.  I keep telling myself to stop with the animals and the food, but it just keeps happening.

Think of this as less of a cooking tutorial and more of a public service announcement.  It could save your life.  Canning with a pressure cooker can be dangerous.

My sister in law gave me some green beans from her garden.  They were already snapped and ready to go, bless her heart.

Canning green beans is not that hard, but for some reason, I get nervous about it.  The pressure cooker makes me jumpy.

Superfrydad asked if he could help & since he is great at making jelly, I took him up on his offer.

Basically, you put the beans in the jars, add a tsp. of salt, fill up with hot water & put the lids on.

I filled the jars, added the salt & the water & SFD wiped the tops and put the lids on.

However, I forgot to nag  tell him to not tighten the lids like He-Man.  I had already had to stop him because he was putting the lids on before I filled them up with water.....that should have been my clue to send him out of the kitchen.

But I was just glad that he was there helping trying to help, so I kept my bossiness to a minimum and tried to just let him do it without telling him what to do.  How hard is it to wipe off the rim and put the lid on, right?

SFD must have wanted us to have to crack open the glass jar to get to the beans because he tightened the lids so much that after they came out, some of the lids buckled.

If the lid buckles, that's not good.  6 out of 14 quarts had buckled lids.

That would normally make me go into a bit of a tilt-o-angry-whirl.  However, I've been working on trying not to get mad over things that don't matter, so I decided to chalk it up to experience and today I am canning green beans all by myself.  Without anger.  Nobody wants beans canned with anger.  Beans canned with love are much better.  They probably don't give you gas, either......you know you were doing it!  Anytime you hear the word beans, you sing "beans, beans, the musical fruit, the more you eat 'em, the more you toot" OR "beans, beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat 'em, the more you fart, the more you fart, the better you feel, so let's have beans for every meal!"

a big moth and a book recommendation

So I posted this picture of a Luna Moth on my facebook wall.

 Here is a closer shot where you can see it's hairy neck and weird, feathery antennae.

A couple of people commented that they had never seen one of these.  We get them kind of a lot.  I checked online and it seems they like walnut trees, which we have several of close by, which must be why we have them at our house.

Whenever I see a moth, I think about this book I read called "The Sister" by Poppy Adams.  It's not really about moths, but it has a lot of moth stuff in it that blew my mind.  Like, moths turn into pupal soup and then turn into a moth again.  Did you know that?  I did not and it is something that sticks in my brain like a popcorn kernel that never goes away.

Here is a little snippet I stole found on another blog:

Pupal soup is the liquid, living matter that you will find in the cocoon of a moth during metamorphosis. The caterpillar totally dissolves into liquid DNA and can remain dormant, or even frozen for long periods of time. Eventually this soup coalesces into a new animal and a moth emerges.

WHAT?????  That is the weirdest thing I have ever heard.  

And also, according to Wikipedia , they only live as a moth for one week and they do not eat, therefore they do not have a mouth.  Or maybe it's they don't have a mouth, therefore they don't eat.  Whatever.  

You have to admit, these moths are pretty cool.  However, between The Silence of the Lambs, no mouth, and their freakish size, their creepy factor is pretty high.  

the annual shaving of the beast

Today was the annual shaving of the beast.

Also known as giving our dog his summer hair cut.

I was informed by my only KWTF reader one of my readers that for an animal un-lover, I sure do post a lot about animals.  Yes,  yes, I do.  I don't know why.  I don't like to cook, but I've been posting some recipe tutorials.  I don't really like animals, but I blogged about giraffes and donkeys.  What can I say?  I am a hypocrite, I guess.  Whatever.  It's my blog and I will post what I want.  Na-nee-na-nee-boo-boo.

Anyway.....so this is about Woodrow, who is our kind of old and very stinky dog.  He looks like a bear and his hair is really thick.  He gets one haircut a year, which usually takes about 2 hours to do.  We've taken him to groomers before but we don't do that anymore because:

      a.  One time, Woodrow jumped out of the back of Superfrydad's truck on a main road.
      b.  After that, SFD decided to let him ride up front in the truck and Woodrow puked.  SFD grabbed a handful of napkins, scooped up the blob of puke and tried to throw it out the window.  I say "tried" because his window was up so he splattered the puke blob all over his window.
      c.  Groomers are expensive and we are kind of poor.  Or cheap.  Some of both, really.

I did not get a "before" picture....this is side one being shaved.  
I personally think he should have given him a doggie mohawk all the way down his back.  

This is the pile of hair from side one.

A close up of the pile of hair from side one.

If there was a "Locks of Love for Dogs", Woodrow would be their best donor.

 After.  Nice and cool for summer.

And, for the record, last year I posted this about my dog, and it spent a brief time on the list of most popular posts at KWTFs.  I'm sure there are only 1 or 2 people out there who will understand that this totally irritated the you-know-what out of me.   But here I am again, posting about my dog's haircut.  I think I've come undone, people.  This is my life.  Posting about a giant pile of dog hair.  Someone.  please.  help.  me.

black raspberry jelly

I don't know why I keep writing posts about  how to cook things.

First, there was Strawberry Jam.

Then, there was how to cook the perfect Crayfish.

Now KWTF presents to you.......Black Raspberry Jelly.

Please note that this is not an official recipe.  These directions are partly from the Sure-Jell package and partly from my mother-in-law.  Don't complain to me if you try this at home and it doesn't work.

Step One:
Get some black raspberries.  These were picked by my nephew, who is not afraid of snakes and does not get poison.

Next, add some water to the berries, heat and mash with a potato masher.

Remove from heat and remove the seeds using a mesh strainer.

Add water if needed to make 4 1/2 cups of juice.

Pour the juice into a big pot.  Yes, I have cankle wrists.

Add a tiny bit of butter.  Butter in jelly, you say?  Yes.  Paula Deen probably makes butter jelly, but this is not butter jelly.  The little pat of butter keeps it from foaming too much.  Or so I'm told.

Add one box of Sure Jell, which is made by Kraft.  No, Kraft did not pay me to say that.  It's just what I use.  I tried to use Ball's brand of pectin & when I opened the package, the directions told me to buy something else in order to make the kind of jelly I make.  Yes, that is really true.  I should have known that Ball is not a good brand.  Just look at their name.  Ball makes you think of testicle, and testicles and canning don't really go together.  Unless you are canning Rocky Mountain Oysters, which I don't think anyone does. Anyway....back to the Black Raspberry Jelly.

Heat until it comes to a rolling boil, stirring constantly.  Yes, my wrist is still a cankle.  

Stir in 6 1/2 cups of sugar.  Yep.  More sugar than juice.  I didn't say it was healthy black raspberry jelly.

After you add the sugar, bring it back up to a rolling boil & set a timer for one minute, stirring constantly.  If you want to see a picture of my cankle wrist stirring, just scroll up a little because I'm not posting a picture of that again.  Skim off any foam and then ladle into jars and put the lids on.

The directions tell you to place them in a water bath in a canner but I live on the edge & just let them sit on the counter.  They will make little popping noises as they seal.  

I made 4 batches today & got 29 half pint jars and 9 teeny weeny cute baby jars.

I feel like it's bragging to say that, but oh well, it's pretty good jelly & you should be jealous.

This will hopefully be the last food related post at KWTF.  I'm sure I'm getting on everyone's nerves trying to pretend that I am the Pioneer Woman.  Just imagine if I really WAS the Pioneer Woman.  Then I would REALLY get on your nerves because I would post things about my bassett hound all the time, and homeschooling, and how handsome my husband is.